Advice needed for living situation

[sammi1987]

I live with my boyfriend and his parents with our 4 month old baby girl. We've dated for almost 4 years now. When there is an argument between us (misunderstanding) he always leaves the house and goes to friends. When she was born, he asked me to move in so I did. But he was never at home with us. He would come home 3am in the morning. Would come home drunk. Was never home on weekends and if he went out he'd leave us there. He would never take us with. We had an argument on Sat because he was making plans with a friend behind my back to spend the day with him on sunday and leave us at home. I didnt feel it was right. He has not come home since sunday morning. He has only been home for 5 min to fetch work clothes and 1 time during lunchtime. Is this wrong behaviour? When I asked him to come home to us he said that he cant, he needs time. I have been a diligent, dedicated mother in caring for my child. I feel he is so selfish. I have not been out like he has since our child was born. Its always been with him or with her. What do you suggest for this type of situation? I'd like us to go to councelling to sort our differences out so that we can have a better understanding of eachother. I dont want to have a broken family and have to deal with all the legal implications. He did say on sat that he will move out and go to a lawyer. But I know he said that out of anger. But what legal rights does he have anyway? I gave her her Father's surname. Im very hurt at his behaviour. He hasnt been home for 2 days. I dont know when he is coming home and I think he is very unfair on our child and myself as I am trying to cope and pull thru on my own. Pls can you offer some assistance and advice.

 

[jacksgal]

Your question reads mor elike you seek relationship advice than legal advice. This site if for legal advice. do you desire to leave this man and need to know the legalities in doing so? If yes we can help if you seek advice on how to handle this emotional situation then this is not the right location

 

[army judge]

You allowed a slug to breed you.

You've brought an illegitimate child into the world.

The slug doesn't respect you.

You're going to be forced to raise the child alone.

You never had a family, only a fling.

We all reap what we sew.

Get out now.

Return to your family.

Why?

Soon the beatings will begin, if they haven't already started.

Him thumping on you is no way to live.

You're a human being.

Don't allow that evil devil to further degrade you.

Go home.

You can fix it, but not as long as you live with that selfish beast!!!!

 

[Proserpina]

If he's established as father legally (ie, did he sign paternity papers at the hospital?), he can file for custody and visitation.

Just as you can.

 

[army judge]

If he's established as father legally (ie, did he sign paternity papers at the hospital?), he can file for custody and visitation.

Just as you can.

I don't think what we say will matter much.

Why?

The OP is somewhere in deepest, darkest Africa.

I'm sure laws are very different on that continent.

True, very true.

But, in reality very few of these slugs even bother.

Except, mom has putative custody because she carried the package for nine months.

 

[Proserpina]

Oh snap, I missed that. Ooops!

 

[disagreeable]

I don't think what we say will matter much.

Why?

The OP is somewhere in deepest, darkest Africa.

I'm sure laws are very different on that continent.

True, very true.

But, in reality very few of these slugs even bother.

Except, mom has putative custody because she carried the package for nine months.

Not to compound your emotions, however with the AIDS rate there, you might want to stop breeding with him.

 

[army judge]

Not to compound your emotions, however with the AIDS rate there, you might want to stop breeding with him.

True, very, very true!!!!