If my ex asks, can the court force us to sell?
YES.
Heck, you can request the court to partition the property, too.
It isn't smart to do that, because the court and the appointed HENCHMAN or HENCHWOMAN would receive a share of the profits for overseeing the sale.
Bottom line, its time to agree on selling the property and splitting the assets 50/50.
If so, can the court award most/all of the net proceeds to my ex?
The court could, if the male is stupid.
What the court usually does, assuming there is no previous agreement to the contrary, is split the proceeds 50/50, taking about 10-20% as its cut of the deal.
The government always gets paid, before you get paid.
Think of the IRS and the various state taxing agencies.
Hence, time to negotiate a deal, rather than get what's left after the court takes a hefty cut.