Court seems biased

[sleestack]

Jurisdiction

Virginia

Hi

My sister is in a very very bitter custody battle with her ex husband, whom has been the sole breadwinner and she has been the stay at home mom for the last 13 years to their 13 year old and 9 year old.

My sister is not independently wealthy and her ex was allowed to cut her off financially completely as of January when the divorce began. She is struggling to survive financially, as it has been challenging to obtain a job that pays enough in this time of life, and she has been out of the work force for so long and does not have a college degree. Her husband's family is a well respected family that goes many generations back in the city. His father is a well respected Dentist. His mother is a teacher. They donate to charity, etc. But they are awful people and vindictive towards my sister, because she wanted to leave their son, after many years of his narcissistic mental and emotional abuse. They know my sister was a good mother. But they are using everything they can to paint a picture that isn't real. My sister drank a bit too much during covid, and during the end of their 15 year marriage because of the entrapment to this abusive person, whom refused to let her have a separation. They, including her husband, used that to make her look like an alcoholic, ..She no longer drinks, and has been sober for 2.5 months.

They got child protective services involved. They took her kids away because during Christmas she went out and had two glasses of wine when she was only allowed 1. They had a private eye take pictures of her.

I feel this whole court is biased against her. That the family has too much influence and sway. The GAL that deals with the kids will not speak to my sister because she no longer has a lawyer. My sister ran out of money for lawyers. The GAL that is supposed to communicate between the Father, my sister and the kids is paid by the family of the ex husband. That seems like a conflict of interest. Also, the husband grew up with the Chief DA of the county they are divorcing in, and the DA is very friendly with his whole family. The whole thing smells wrong and Im asking if there can be oversight somehow? It's a county court in VA. I dont want to get too specific. What can you do if you think everything is just too biased?



She doesn't miss drinking , So that is good. Her alcohol abuse wasn't that severe though. She was never in a DUI. Never drunk in the morning. Nothing like that. Thats is why it is strange. She is a Mom who likes a glass of wine at night. Not anymore of course. I am a witness. It wasn't severe. Hence why Im asking the question. She needs an attorney, She spent all her money during the CPS portion (my mother's life savings) . But she has been totally cut off financially. I don't know what women are to do in a situation like this. How can they get representation if the breadwinner cuts them off completely ?

I should add these people. The parents of the husband. Have done this before. Taken children away. They took the fathers (the dentist) brothers children from his wife many years ago cause she was depressed.. It's their MO if you will. Rather cruel to be honest. They got their kids back though. I do believe courts want kids with the mother in the end. Kids want their mom

 

[Tax Counsel]

The problem here is that you are not unbiased in this situation either. That's to be expected. You support your sister and view the situation through the way she sees it. The father's family sees things quite differently, which is not unusual in bitterly contested custody and support conflicts. I can't tell whether the court may be biased just on what you provided here. I can understand that if rulings are going against your sister your reaction would be that the deck is stacked against her. That's natural when you are supporting someone close to you.

What matters is what evidence the judge has before him/her to base their decision on. If the father's been able to present evidence that supports their version of what is going on and your sister doesn't have evidence or legal arguments to make to successful rebut their claims, the father's side is likely to prevail. The evidence presented to the court is all the judge is going to have to go on in making the decision.

You alluded to some alcohol issues that your sister had. The details of that matter. If she did things while intoxicated that might result in neglect of the child the court is going to have to take that into account. If there is evidence that she had become an alcholic, then the court would be concerned about the possibility she might relapse into that addiction, which then would aversely affect her children.

The typical way to deal with a court decision that the losing party thinks was wrong, or was the result of bias, etc is to make an appeal to next higher court, typically the court of appeals, to get an order to remedy whatever the trial judge did wrong.

She'd really benefit from some legal help from a family law attorney in her state. There are programs in most states that provide free or low cost legal services for those who can't afford them. That's an option she really should explore. She'll do better going up against her ex who has an attorney if she has one of her own.

 

[welkin]

My sister is not independently wealthy and her ex was allowed to cut her off financially completely as of January when the divorce began.

The how being cut off financially completely is important, so if you know the details, what are they? It would be hard to believe that after 15 years of marriage, a court would not require temporary spousal support during the pendency of the divorce and leave the spouse destitute.

https://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/title20/chapter6/section20-107.1/

Your sister really needs a lawyer, either through a legal clinic, a local law school, or some community help program because, if there is a divorce action pending, what her lawyer pleaded in the complaint about support has to be carefully looked at according to Virginia case law. If temporary support was not pleaded, that is a big problem.