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is there anyway to get a deposition before showing your evidence?
The purpose of a deposition is to lock a person's story down, so they can't change it in court. Or, if they die or disappear before trial.
If their deposition contradicts their in court testimony, you can use your deposition to discredit their testimony.
A deposition is always done prior to trial. It has nothing to do with any evidence you might later submit at trial.
Not necessarily.
I suspect you're currently in the discovery phase, right? If that's the case (this a family law matter IIRC), they'll likely want to hold off on a deposition until the very last minute...
The attorney likely isn't dumb