Ex girlfriend going after my husband - Retaliation TRO

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AmberB1984

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Hello, I'm a newcomer here and so glad I found these forums! My life has been so stressful lately. Please forgive me if I do not make much sense in this post (sick with my 3 month old) - I had a few questions regarding a TRO and my husband's crazy ex girlfriend. Maybe some of you have experience with this..

My husband has been separated from and has not had any contact with his ex for over a year.
I got married to my husband on September 24th of this year. 4 days later his ex girlfriend whom he does have a child with contacted us saying she filed a rape allegation against him, claiming he had raped her over a year ago.
She also called CPS on me as I just had a newborn who was in the hospital from birthing complications.
The CPS case was closed and the rape allegation has been sitting at the DA's for months now..

During this time my husband had to go to court to modify his child support payments. He never filed a motion for custody or visitation because they broke up when the child was only a few months old and he never had a chance to bond properly..that and everything she put him through I think it pushed him away.. I know this sounds horrible but it's the truth..

After the rape allegation, she went and got a temporary restraining order on him stating she was in danger, that he would possibly take his child with her out of state, that he molested her oldest daughter two years ago!! She also claimed he has a very violent past, that he hit her and her child, niece, and nephew 2 years ago. There are no reports of this ever happening. It is made up. She has no evidence except some members of her family who are supporting her.

His court date with her for the restraining order is coming up. We have our marriage certificate and some of her threats in screen shot form from Facebook. We also have declarations from family and friends.. I read the judge will usually err on the side of caution and grant the women restraining orders when children are involved. I don't know if this is true or not? Like I said, he is not going for visitation and even agreed to her request for no visitation in the TRO response.

Has anyone had experience with this? I am hoping when the judge sees our marriage license and that he has moved on and poses no threat he will drop the case. This has been so stressful, my husband and I just want to move on..

Thanks to anyone who replies! I'm a high strung mess over here!
 
If the ex can't show some recent event in which she was threatened and reasonably fears for her safety she is unlikely to get the restraining order if your husbands defends against it.
If it is as you describe I don't see this going anywhere.
 
Hello, I'm a newcomer here and so glad I found these forums! My life has been so stressful lately. Please forgive me if I do not make much sense in this post (sick with my 3 month old) - I had a few questions regarding a TRO and my husband's crazy ex girlfriend. Maybe some of you have experience with this..

My husband has been separated from and has not had any contact with his ex for over a year.
I got married to my husband on September 24th of this year.

When you say "separated" you don't mean that he was still married to her...right?

4 days later his ex girlfriend whom he does have a child with contacted us saying she filed a rape allegation against him, claiming he had raped her over a year ago.
She also called CPS on me as I just had a newborn who was in the hospital from birthing complications.
The CPS case was closed and the rape allegation has been sitting at the DA's for months now..

During this time my husband had to go to court to modify his child support payments. He never filed a motion for custody or visitation because they broke up when the child was only a few months old and he never had a chance to bond properly..that and everything she put him through I think it pushed him away.. I know this sounds horrible but it's the truth..

After the rape allegation, she went and got a temporary restraining order on him stating she was in danger, that he would possibly take his child with her out of state, that he molested her oldest daughter two years ago!! She also claimed he has a very violent past, that he hit her and her child, niece, and nephew 2 years ago. There are no reports of this ever happening. It is made up. She has no evidence except some members of her family who are supporting her.

Witnesses might make a difference.

He REALLY needs an attorney.

His court date with her for the restraining order is coming up. We have our marriage certificate and some of her threats in screen shot form from Facebook. We also have declarations from family and friends.. I read the judge will usually err on the side of caution and grant the women restraining orders when children are involved. I don't know if this is true or not? Like I said, he is not going for visitation and even agreed to her request for no visitation in the TRO response.

Agreeing to no visitation is probably a mistake.

Has anyone had experience with this? I am hoping when the judge sees our marriage license and that he has moved on and poses no threat he will drop the case. This has been so stressful, my husband and I just want to move on..

Thanks to anyone who replies! I'm a high strung mess over here!


Getting married doesn't prove that he didn't do anything. I'm sorry, but your husband NEEDS an attorney.

Yesterday.
 
Restraining orders aren't so awful, because they make it easier to stay away from people you don't like.

As far as him not seeing his child, does he KNOW its his child? Has he had after his paternity established via DNA testing? If not, it might be time to start that process.

Otherwise, he needs a lawyer. You would be best served by being supportive,otherwise it'll serve everyone best by you staying out of this publicly.




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Using caution is wise and its better to protect possible victims than do nothing and place innocents in harms way. Without solid evidence a TRO is tough. However since your husband has no real contact with either the child or Mom and other allegations are gone nowhere where is your concern? If your hubby doesnt have any real contact with either the TRO is pointless even if granted.
You mention other children how many children does your husband have? How many EXs?
 
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