I have a major issue that revolves around one family member (a 35 year old man that acts more like a 12 year old):
My late husband passed away almost three years ago without a will. We were married for 24 years. We live in the state of Maryland and I still continue to live at our residence. As his spouse, when he passed I went to the Registrar of Wills in our county and was told to obtain a list of all items that were in his name only and their current value including bank accounts, stocks, real property & autos. The only items in just his name only were stocks equaling about 6K and another 5K in bank accounts. His estate according to Maryland was considered a small estate, and I was told at that time I would be allotted 5K for the family to live and 5K towards his funeral expenses. Any remainder was to be used towards any debt that he owed.
My husband and I had two sons; he had another son from his previous marriage. The Registrar of Wills contacted all three boys to notify them that I was appointed executor of my husbands' estate. My stepson contacted me when he received his notice and asked what this meant and should he protest it. I explained to him at the time that if he wanted the position, I would gladly give it to him. This meant not only dealing with family members, the funeral bill, he would also answer to companies that his father had debt with. I also told him about the 5K meant for the family and if I split it among each of the boys and I, everyone would get $1,250. I also explained that it needed to be held in escrow for 6 months before being divided. He proceeded to asked me about the house, which I told him, we had joint tenancy and his father's share of the house reverted to me. He then asked about the vehicle, I told him the same rules apply. He then asked about his father's life insurance, at which point I told him his father didn't have a large policy and it was meant for me to remain in our home and pay the household bills. He then wanted to know what he would be getting from my estate when I died, so I told him in the grand scheme of things, he got nothing because he wasn't related by adoption or by blood. However, I choose to tell him that I had gone and created a will and he would be getting a portion of my estate that it wouldn't be as large as his brothers because he was older, married and in many ways able to take care of himself. He made the comment to me that if he got 25% of my estate he would be happy. At the six month point he contacted me to see when he would be getting his share as he had recently bought an item with the idea that he would pay for it with his inheritance.
A year passes and I receive a collect call in the middle of the night, my stepson and his wife had a fight, she had him arrested and placed in jail. He asked if I would come and bail him out. Not knowing any better I did and I brought him to my house until they could work things out. I made arrangements to obtain legal counsel for him and paid the retainer fee. While sitting in front of the lawyer I made a statement that while I currently had room for my stepson I did not have room for any additional people in the house. His wife had requested and was granted temporary custody of their two children. He kept telling counsel that he had to have custody of his children. He has been the caregiver for eight years while his wife worked.
It appears that my statement has now fallen on deaf ears. He has had an argument with his wife and said that she tried to run him over with her car and then had her arrested for assault. He has (according to what I've been told) been granted complete custody of his children. All three of them are now in my home and sharing a bedroom. Each time I mention to him about getting a regular job (he delivers news papers) so that he can properly care for his children; I'm told that he made a commitment to do papers for the next two years. I then asked him if he signed a contract about this because if he didn't his commitment went out the window when his wife threw him out the house. He then has an excuse on why he needs to keep the paper route.
I sat down with him and have gone over his spending habits, in an attempt to get him to understand about budgets and to set up one. I have shown him that he is consistently spending more money than he brings in each month. At that time he was making about $900 a month delivering papers. So he went out and got a part-time position with UPS. The part-time job brings home about $200 a week. His wife is giving him about $400 a month for child support, so in essence he has about $2100 a month to spend but instead spends an average of $3400 per month. Because my utilities have increased an average of 75%, I started collecting money from him to help defray the additional costs.
He told me that he is planning on moving out of state with someone he met on-line. But because of things they would all have to stay at the house for about a month. I told him no, because this person is a foreign national and I couldn't afford to lose my position. I then asked him when he was planning on asking me if it was okay to which he replied once everything was set in stone.
We recently had an argument over his bringing in items every day and he made a statement that he was tired of being threatened all of the time. I told him to leave that I would be changing the locks on the house. He made the statement that he would have me arrested for assault and he would be living in my house.
To protect myself, I wrote up a document on my computer that stated he had to be out of the house no later than 5pm on June 30th (this giving enough time for the children to finish out the school year). It also stated that anything left behind at that time would either be sold to pay for any damages to the house or would be placed in storage and the contract would be his responsibility to either pay or pickup. I gave the notice to him last month so in essence he has been given 100+ days notice to vacate. How can I remove him with the least amount of problems as I am now afraid of what he may do?
My late husband passed away almost three years ago without a will. We were married for 24 years. We live in the state of Maryland and I still continue to live at our residence. As his spouse, when he passed I went to the Registrar of Wills in our county and was told to obtain a list of all items that were in his name only and their current value including bank accounts, stocks, real property & autos. The only items in just his name only were stocks equaling about 6K and another 5K in bank accounts. His estate according to Maryland was considered a small estate, and I was told at that time I would be allotted 5K for the family to live and 5K towards his funeral expenses. Any remainder was to be used towards any debt that he owed.
My husband and I had two sons; he had another son from his previous marriage. The Registrar of Wills contacted all three boys to notify them that I was appointed executor of my husbands' estate. My stepson contacted me when he received his notice and asked what this meant and should he protest it. I explained to him at the time that if he wanted the position, I would gladly give it to him. This meant not only dealing with family members, the funeral bill, he would also answer to companies that his father had debt with. I also told him about the 5K meant for the family and if I split it among each of the boys and I, everyone would get $1,250. I also explained that it needed to be held in escrow for 6 months before being divided. He proceeded to asked me about the house, which I told him, we had joint tenancy and his father's share of the house reverted to me. He then asked about the vehicle, I told him the same rules apply. He then asked about his father's life insurance, at which point I told him his father didn't have a large policy and it was meant for me to remain in our home and pay the household bills. He then wanted to know what he would be getting from my estate when I died, so I told him in the grand scheme of things, he got nothing because he wasn't related by adoption or by blood. However, I choose to tell him that I had gone and created a will and he would be getting a portion of my estate that it wouldn't be as large as his brothers because he was older, married and in many ways able to take care of himself. He made the comment to me that if he got 25% of my estate he would be happy. At the six month point he contacted me to see when he would be getting his share as he had recently bought an item with the idea that he would pay for it with his inheritance.
A year passes and I receive a collect call in the middle of the night, my stepson and his wife had a fight, she had him arrested and placed in jail. He asked if I would come and bail him out. Not knowing any better I did and I brought him to my house until they could work things out. I made arrangements to obtain legal counsel for him and paid the retainer fee. While sitting in front of the lawyer I made a statement that while I currently had room for my stepson I did not have room for any additional people in the house. His wife had requested and was granted temporary custody of their two children. He kept telling counsel that he had to have custody of his children. He has been the caregiver for eight years while his wife worked.
It appears that my statement has now fallen on deaf ears. He has had an argument with his wife and said that she tried to run him over with her car and then had her arrested for assault. He has (according to what I've been told) been granted complete custody of his children. All three of them are now in my home and sharing a bedroom. Each time I mention to him about getting a regular job (he delivers news papers) so that he can properly care for his children; I'm told that he made a commitment to do papers for the next two years. I then asked him if he signed a contract about this because if he didn't his commitment went out the window when his wife threw him out the house. He then has an excuse on why he needs to keep the paper route.
I sat down with him and have gone over his spending habits, in an attempt to get him to understand about budgets and to set up one. I have shown him that he is consistently spending more money than he brings in each month. At that time he was making about $900 a month delivering papers. So he went out and got a part-time position with UPS. The part-time job brings home about $200 a week. His wife is giving him about $400 a month for child support, so in essence he has about $2100 a month to spend but instead spends an average of $3400 per month. Because my utilities have increased an average of 75%, I started collecting money from him to help defray the additional costs.
He told me that he is planning on moving out of state with someone he met on-line. But because of things they would all have to stay at the house for about a month. I told him no, because this person is a foreign national and I couldn't afford to lose my position. I then asked him when he was planning on asking me if it was okay to which he replied once everything was set in stone.
We recently had an argument over his bringing in items every day and he made a statement that he was tired of being threatened all of the time. I told him to leave that I would be changing the locks on the house. He made the statement that he would have me arrested for assault and he would be living in my house.
To protect myself, I wrote up a document on my computer that stated he had to be out of the house no later than 5pm on June 30th (this giving enough time for the children to finish out the school year). It also stated that anything left behind at that time would either be sold to pay for any damages to the house or would be placed in storage and the contract would be his responsibility to either pay or pickup. I gave the notice to him last month so in essence he has been given 100+ days notice to vacate. How can I remove him with the least amount of problems as I am now afraid of what he may do?
