Im being harrased by a man i had an affair with.

[saddiva01]

I am being harassed by a man I had an affair with. Out of the blue he tells me to pay him $1000 or he would tell my husband. Revealing online conversations, and pictures. I told him I didn't have it so he then changed the price to $300. After hours of messages asking him to just end it and leave me alone he continued with the harassment. I stateds that I would contact law enforcement if he did because that is considered extortion but he kept pressing the issue of money. He has attempted to contact my husband on fb many times but deleted them. So I just wanted it to end so I payed him the $300 and the terms where that he never contact me or my husband again. He agreed so I thought I was in the clear. But after 2 weeks he contacts me saying he is sorry but he needs $100, so I don't respond and the messages continue with threats and he even stated that I can call police cause he will send them if I don't respond. I don't respond and block him from contacting both me and my husband on Facebook.....So my question is is there anything I can do to stop him from harassing me and to not send any info to my husband. He just won't stop and its scaring me. && if you are wondering yes I love my husband we have just had a really rough year.

 

[Proserpina]

Telling your husband would completely remove this other man's sense of control.

Don't you owe it to your husband?

 

[shrinkmaster]

I concur. You created this problem by ignoring your wedding vows. Where I agree this man is acting in an unlawful manner, the solution is to tell your husband then Police. By telling your husband you take his power over you away. It also frees you to tell Police since your husband would surely find out then. This will never stop until you do this. How it impacts your marriage none of us can say but again the blackmailing will not stop until you take action and that first action is talking to your husband

 

[army judge]

I am being harassed by a man I had an affair with. Out of the blue he tells me to pay him $1000 or he would tell my husband. Revealing online conversations, and pictures. I told him I didn't have it so he then changed the price to $300. After hours of messages asking him to just end it and leave me alone he continued with the harassment. I stateds that I would contact law enforcement if he did because that is considered extortion but he kept pressing the issue of money. He has attempted to contact my husband on fb many times but deleted them. So I just wanted it to end so I payed him the $300 and the terms where that he never contact me or my husband again. He agreed so I thought I was in the clear. But after 2 weeks he contacts me saying he is sorry but he needs $100, so I don't respond and the messages continue with threats and he even stated that I can call police cause he will send them if I don't respond. I don't respond and block him from contacting both me and my husband on Facebook.....So my question is is there anything I can do to stop him from harassing me and to not send any info to my husband. He just won't stop and its scaring me. && if you are wondering yes I love my husband we have just had a really rough year.

Your biggest mistake was even worrying about what another person threatened to do to you.

What if he had contacted your husband?

Why would your husband believe him?

If my wife received a similar message, from an unknown party, she'd tell me about it.

Then we'd have a good laugh, because she would know it isn't true.

So, giving this "kiss and tell" cad any money was a big error.

So, what do you do now?

Well, I suppose you have reveal all the sordid details to your husband, including your dishing out the dollars.

It is time to come clean, if you want the Sword of Damocles removed form over your head.

Then, you should report the matter to your local law enforcement agency.

Bring your proof, emails, text message, FB postings, anything that supports his blackmail.

The police agency will do the rest.

Until you tell it all, he will be in control.

It will eventually come out, it almost always does.

You've got a lot to do, I wish you well!