In Need of advise

[geewhiz37825]

I got a divorce in 2002 and I have full custody of my now 9 year old son, I moved to PA from TN after I had enough of the abuse from his father. I kept my son from him for 2 years. I let him go for a visit through the summer. and then after that he wanted to stay with his dad for a while that lasted a few months and then he wanted to return home. He was doing very well in school so I made him finish the school year out. Last summer I was going to keep him and everyone made him feel bad about wanting to come home so he went back for another school year. I would not give my custody up and I told them I would not force him to come back. Now I have told his father today that he will not be back to live. His family is now calling my phone demanding our son to talk he doesnt want to talk to anyone but his dad and that is only to tell him he doesnt want to live there. Do I have to make my son talk on the phone will? do I have to make him go for a visit when he doesn't want to go? What do I do? Should I be worried? I am scared I dont want them upsetting my son.

 

[irish223]

I got a divorce in 2002 and I have full custody of my now 9 year old son, I moved to PA from TN after I had enough of the abuse from his father. I kept my son from him for 2 years. I let him go for a visit through the summer. and then after that he wanted to stay with his dad for a while that lasted a few months and then he wanted to return home. He was doing very well in school so I made him finish the school year out. Last summer I was going to keep him and everyone made him feel bad about wanting to come home so he went back for another school year. I would not give my custody up and I told them I would not force him to come back. Now I have told his father today that he will not be back to live. His family is now calling my phone demanding our son to talk he doesnt want to talk to anyone but his dad and that is only to tell him he doesnt want to live there. Do I have to make my son talk on the phone will? do I have to make him go for a visit when he doesn't want to go? What do I do? Should I be worried? I am scared I dont want them upsetting my son.

Yes, you should be worried. If your ex had visitation rights and you denied them, then you were in contempt. CPs can lose custody for that.

Further, you established a new custody arrangement by allowing your son to live with his father for 2 years (if I'm reading correctly). He could ask for a custody modification based on that, and get it.

Also, if your ex has court-ordered visitation, then your son does not get to decide whether or not he will visit.

You should consult an attorney.

 

[geewhiz37825]

there was no knew agreement made other then me having a paper typed up and I had notrized stating he had my permission for his dad to get him medical treatment and for school reasons. His father has been in the Hospital for over a month and can no longer walk. His father has several police records from our marriage I will fight it with all I have. He doesnt want to go back and Iwill not force him. I cant do that he is scared to even talk on the phone. How do you force your child to do that?

 

[irish223]

When you got full custody of your son during your divorce, didn't his father get ANY visitation? If not, then you had no obligation to send him for visits. Technically, you do not have to send your son back to his father's either.

However, you set a new status quo when you allowed your son to live with his father for 2 years. IF his father pursues custody in court, then he has a good argument, based on status quo. Whatever happened during your marriage won't count against him because you allowed your son to live with him despite that.