My ex-husband has spent a grand total of 24 hours with our almost 4 year old daughter since our divorce was finalized almost exactly one year ago, none of them out of my care at all, as he does not have a valid driver's license (but drives anyway - It is specifically in my divorce decree that he must have a valid license to transport her, so he has not taken her from my care - the license is suspended for an unpaid traffic ticket.) The last visit was 8 months ago. During that last visit, she had a rather "dirty" accident in her pants, and he told me "You change it. She lives with you!" and left the room.
I contact him as soon as I find out about special events with her preschool, including parent-teacher conferences, and her church choir performances. He has attended none of them, and it breaks her heart every time. I have expressed this to him, and get a standard "I know. I don't have any money." EVERY TIME. I have offered to meet him halfway, to spend a day at the zoo, or for lunch at an outdoor mall over the summer. Every time, the answer is the same.
In November, he came to my home to (finally) remove his truck from my property, and did not stay the additional half hour that would have been required for our daughter to be out of preschool to see her.
He also refuses to tell me where he works; Out of 14 months that I should have been receiving child support (including temporary) for our daughter, I have received about 4 months' worth.
I would like to ask for sole legal custody, as I don't believe that he knows her well enough to know what is best for her. He has routinely deferred decisions to me rather than discuss them, and I have documented these, as well as the few visits and my attempts at getting him to see her. Also, I would like a modification of child support, as it was previously figured on his making just over minimum wage, and he has hinted, but will not verify, that he is making far more.
Are these reasonable goals given that he has not chosen to be involved in her life? Thank you!
I contact him as soon as I find out about special events with her preschool, including parent-teacher conferences, and her church choir performances. He has attended none of them, and it breaks her heart every time. I have expressed this to him, and get a standard "I know. I don't have any money." EVERY TIME. I have offered to meet him halfway, to spend a day at the zoo, or for lunch at an outdoor mall over the summer. Every time, the answer is the same.
In November, he came to my home to (finally) remove his truck from my property, and did not stay the additional half hour that would have been required for our daughter to be out of preschool to see her.
He also refuses to tell me where he works; Out of 14 months that I should have been receiving child support (including temporary) for our daughter, I have received about 4 months' worth.
I would like to ask for sole legal custody, as I don't believe that he knows her well enough to know what is best for her. He has routinely deferred decisions to me rather than discuss them, and I have documented these, as well as the few visits and my attempts at getting him to see her. Also, I would like a modification of child support, as it was previously figured on his making just over minimum wage, and he has hinted, but will not verify, that he is making far more.
Are these reasonable goals given that he has not chosen to be involved in her life? Thank you!
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