My husband has been gone 10 years!

[rachel33811]

I married my husband on February 19, 1999. Once we married my husband took a change for the worst. He did not want me wearing make-up if I left the house without him. He got angry when I made more money than him, it was just pathetic. After 4 months of marriage not to mention I was due with our daughter any day, I found myself begging for a divorce. My husband said he didn't care if we stayed married for the rest of our lives... he would not divorce me. I waited another 4 months and nothing changed. One night my husband left for work early said he needed more hours. I got a phone call from a man looking for him so I told him he was at work. He said write this down, and gave me an address. I went there and found my husband in bed with another woman. He moved out the next day but we are still married. He has been with the other woman since I found them together in 1999. This February 19th will be 11 years and he has been gone for 10 and a half of them. How can I get a quick and easy divorce without it costing a fortune? We have no assets to divide and the state has already taken care of child support. I live in FL and he lives in OR. I have bought the divorce papers a few times and he just ignores it. The only reason he does this is so he doesn't have to marry the woman I found him with... and she called me crying a few years ago saying he cheated on her! Like I care... I just want to get rid of his name! Please tell me what I can do. I'm a single mom of 2 so I can't afford much. I heard I could put an add in the paper and if he doesn't respond I am granted my divorce, is that true? Please he me!!!

 

[jharris352]

If you know where he is you can't serve him by publication. But you certainly can proceed without his permission.

Get a divorce package, file for divorced based on him having abandoned you. Have him served by the police and see if he shows up. Whether he shows up or not you will be granted a divorce. It won't be free but it won't be that expensive either. If it is important enough to you, you will save enough money to do it.

He has waited so long that he really can't even fight you on this. The judge would laugh him out of court and make him pay your attorney bills. Stop worrying about how much it will cost and just do it. You will feel better, and it will be over.

***Edit:

So you have lived all of this time, knowing where he is without child support or contact with your child? I don't even know what to say about that.

 

[rachel33811]

Hello reread the posting... I did go after him for child support. He has paid in for years, I'm not that nice to let him get off the hook like that. And yes I know he's in OR. but if he doesn't want to see his daughter I'm not going to make him. Why would I do that to her? She has me and she knows how much I love her. Why would I make her see someone that doesn't want to see her... that would be cold hearted on my part. It is my job as her mother to protect her from people like that even if it is her own father! So tell me what is it I need fix that I have done so wrong? Oh thats right, I haven't done any thing wrong but my job as the best mother I can be. Think before you post people!

 

[jharris352]

I thought quite a bit before I posted. You didn't make it clear that you did any of those things. I wasn't talking down to you, you seem to have a pretty thin skin. My advice is the same. It would have been best to have taken care of this years ago, but at least you did take care of the child support issue. From the way you said it you had not really had any dealings with him for 10 years.