need help more than ever!!!

[miss_terry]

i have a four year old son whoes father has been in prison for the last 28 months and before he went he was very abusive physiacally and mentally, so on... he now has been released and is trying to get parenting time and i do not trust him at all. i know he has not changed but he has not got caught yet he has a past and present history of drug use and selling, again physiall abuse and is a flight risk. i have one very important wittness but she is scared to death to talk beacuase she has to do so in front of him and knows his past and how his family will react. i really dont have any other witness for what is going on right now, plenty of wittness for past situation. what should i do? he is not the type of person my son needs in his life and i have moved on and started a new relationship and my fiance takes great care of my son.

 

[Duranie]

You need to see an attorney and fight for supervised visit. He is Dad and he does have rights. Unless you can prove he is a threat and danger to the child, he might get visitation. He is entitled to at least supervised. You can also ask that dad be subject to drug tests.

If I were you if he is pushing to see the child, I would file for child support.
Please see an attorney to see if you can have visits supervised.

 

[jimmysgirl]

you chose him as your kid's dad

he is not the type of person my son needs in his life

then you should have chosen someone else to be your son's father. instead, you chose him. he will get visitation, and unless you can prove hes a danger to the child, you better get used to the idea of him visiting.

 

[lotsagirls]

Jimmysgirl, what qualifies you to offer legal advice? Are you married to or the daughter of an attorney? Just wondering.

 

[Duranie]

Although jimmygirls advice is harsh, I think the point she is trying to make is people should be more careful who they have kids with. If a guy is an idiot, abusive, on drugs, habitually unemployed, probably not a good idea to have a child with him.

 

[lotsagirls]

Although jimmygirls advice is harsh, I think the point she is trying to make is people should be more careful who they have kids with. If a guy is an idiot, abusive, on drugs, habitually unemployed, probably not a good idea to have a child with him.

Of course, but you can't turn back time. All she can deal with is the here and now. She's not posting on here to be attacked for having a child with someone who is a loser...she probably already knows that. When someone comes here for advice about how to deal with a difficulty in child custody, visitation, etc., it's hard enough to deal with, without having someone (whom I assume really knows very little) making them feel like total and complete garbage. Just my two cents.

 

[jimmysgirl]

Of course, but you can't turn back time. All she can deal with is the here and now. She's not posting on here to be attacked for having a child with someone who is a loser...she probably already knows that. When someone comes here for advice about how to deal with a difficulty in child custody, visitation, etc., it's hard enough to deal with, without having someone (whom I assume really knows very little) making them feel like total and complete garbage. Just my two cents.

im not attacking anyone im stating a fact. once you choose to have a child with someone, you are tied to that other person for the next 18 yrs. they better get used to the fact that that person, if they chose, will be part of the child's life.they dont get to decide after the fact that the op isnt good parent material, or they wont be part of the child's life, thats for a court to decide.the time to decide wether or not someone is good parent material is BEFORE you have unprotected sexwith and concieve a child with them, once you get pregnant, its no longer your decisionto make

 

[lotsagirls]

im not attacking anyone im stating a fact. once you choose to have a child with someone, you are tied to that other person for the next 18 yrs. they better get used to the fact that that person, if they chose, will be part of the child's life.they dont get to decide after the fact that the op isnt good parent material, or they wont be part of the child's life, thats for a court to decide.the time to decide wether or not someone is good parent material is BEFORE you have unprotected sexwith and concieve a child with them, once you get pregnant, its no longer your decisionto make

Jimmysgirl, life is not black and white. There are circumstances, depending on the situation, where a child might not be better off spending time with the bio parent (i.e. drug use, abuse, etc.). Sometimes these things happen AFTER you've had a child with someone. It's isn't always predictable.

Your posts are very confrontational and many of your responses are just looking to start a fight, JMO!!