Relocation and rocky marriage

[faith298]

My husband, daughter and I currently reside in Illinois and have had marital problems for the past several years. We have tried to keep it together but it has been difficult. My husband has been unemployed for the past 12 months and began seeking employment in California because he has always wanted to live there. He has tried to convince me that he will be a better husband and father when he fulfills his dream of living out west. I want to support him in this dream, but I have an intense fear that if we move and end up getting divorced that I will be stuck in California away from family and friends and that I will not legally be able to leave the state with our daughter. We have verbally agreed that if after one year we are still not happy, that I can move back to Illinois with our daughter. I know that in the heat of divorce, previous verbal agreements usually fall to the wayside and I'd like to know if there is something I can do ahead of time (prior to the move) to make this agreement legally binding. Any information you can share would be much appreciated. I want to be supportive but I also need to look out for myself and my daughter. A friend of mine recently got me thinking that getting me to set up residence in CA might be his way of getting what he wants and still being close to our daughter if/when we divorce. Thanks in advance for your advice.

 

[jharris352]

If you are that concerned about it then put the agreement in writing. He may think that is odd but if he refuses then you certainly have a problem. California is a community property state also as opposed to Illinois which isn't. That means that upon divorce ALL PROPERTY acquired during the marriage is divided equally regardless of fault. If you have assets in your name that could be a problem. I would be leery of this entire thing. Get it in writing or don't go.