I filed for Parentage in Utah in 2007; we now have a convoluted Temporary Order. We have been through everything in this case, to include a protective order which the court eventually dismissed early due to evidence it was frivolous.
In the past 1 1/2 years, things have gotten alot better, but the case is still not finalized. Since the child was born he has lived in 10 different places. Today was his 5th Birthday. Now she wants to make it 11 or more.
In November 2009 she asked if we could live together again because her boyfriend in Nevada was abusive. To get the child out of the situation, I agreed. We lived together for 6 months. It was not pretty, she didn't work, she partied 5-6 nights a week over her boyfriends house. She came home late so many times, I got fired due to being late - no daycare on one income. We pulled through on my savings until I found a lower paying, but still good, temp job. We got a roommate, and she bailed to live with her new boyfriend. For the first three months we lived together, I still paid child support, until it became apparent that I was going to be the sole provider for the child.
We had stipulated before the Commissioner that we would have Joint Legal Custody, and she would have sole physical custody; the Court Ordered us each sign the stipulation and return it to the court to sign. She refused to sign it after we already made the agreement before the commissioner. After 6 months of refusing, after she moved out and still refused, I filed an Order to Show Cause for her violation of the oral orders of the court to sign the document. Submitted the Order only signed by me, and the Commissioner said it would be filed unsigned by the Court; but, that the agreement was still binding.
In the interim, she refuses to give me her new Address, the one she gave court is bogus as they got mail returned to them too. Thus, she has violated Utah Rules of Civil Procedure 76. Thus, I keep mailing proceedings to our old address where we lived together.
After she moves out, I have the child 3 days per week (156 days a year), and thus file for Leave to Amend Joint Physical Custody after a few months. Once she got the paperwork, I didn't see my son for 2 months. I filed for an Order to Show Cause a second time. Commissioner refuses to issue Order to Show Cause because Orders were never deduced to writing. I objected using Utah Supreme Court precedence stating order need not be reduced to writing for a finding of contempt. The objection is being reviewed by the presiding judge.
I have been granted Leave to Amend my complaint to seek Joint Physical, and I was granted a Motion to Strike her response, which contained no contact info, and she failed to serve me with under Utah Rules of Civil Procedure 4 or 5. I subsequently filed a Motion to Modify Temporary Orders once I got approval to change my Complaint, that Motion is also under advisement.
I have been able to see my son now under minimum visitation since mid-August. We slowly have been talking more. Although she has still not been cooperative.
So I am invited to his birthday party, first time her and I have seen eachother since June. Ofcourse her boyfriend is there, and she mentions before hand that we needed to talk. I ignore her and the boyfriend and just have a good time with my son, it was great we are closer than we ever have been, first birthday party I have been too for him after all this fighting. I figured she'd tell me she was pregnant, or getting married, blah blah blah.
But, no, she is saying she is moving back to Nevada (the child's 11th move), in the middle of proceedings. She wants me to waive the 60-day notice requirements, because her mom suppossively had a mini-stroke, and her dad had another heart attack in prison. Now I am sympathic, I said "ok, well, you can go for 60 days, then come back - move your mom here - whatever but you're not taking our son away again, not moving him into his 11th home." She was like, "if you make it so I can;t see my parent before they die I'll hate you all my life."
I'm getting really anoyed because she is not putting our son before her needs. He needs a stable environment something that lasts more than 6 months at the most. She will go there and have no job, until she can find one - in this economy (took 6 months last time). I understand her mom and dad are not doing ok, but our son's home is here in Utah, where he has me and his little sister. She can move her mom here and take care of her here, she can let me have our son while she is gone, and come back to see him if she really needs to go see see her parents.
I'm thinking of going down and filing an Emergency Temporary Retsraining Order against her tomorrow to prevent the move of the child out of state. Do I have a chance? What is my rate of success here?
My feelings are she is trying to get away from Utah so they will not award me Joint Physical Custody, or eventually Sole Custody, if she continues down her path. It is ot the first time she has done this too me, the last time is was the same BS, "You'll see him once a month for a week," blah blah blah. Of course it never happened that way.
In the past 1 1/2 years, things have gotten alot better, but the case is still not finalized. Since the child was born he has lived in 10 different places. Today was his 5th Birthday. Now she wants to make it 11 or more.
In November 2009 she asked if we could live together again because her boyfriend in Nevada was abusive. To get the child out of the situation, I agreed. We lived together for 6 months. It was not pretty, she didn't work, she partied 5-6 nights a week over her boyfriends house. She came home late so many times, I got fired due to being late - no daycare on one income. We pulled through on my savings until I found a lower paying, but still good, temp job. We got a roommate, and she bailed to live with her new boyfriend. For the first three months we lived together, I still paid child support, until it became apparent that I was going to be the sole provider for the child.
We had stipulated before the Commissioner that we would have Joint Legal Custody, and she would have sole physical custody; the Court Ordered us each sign the stipulation and return it to the court to sign. She refused to sign it after we already made the agreement before the commissioner. After 6 months of refusing, after she moved out and still refused, I filed an Order to Show Cause for her violation of the oral orders of the court to sign the document. Submitted the Order only signed by me, and the Commissioner said it would be filed unsigned by the Court; but, that the agreement was still binding.
In the interim, she refuses to give me her new Address, the one she gave court is bogus as they got mail returned to them too. Thus, she has violated Utah Rules of Civil Procedure 76. Thus, I keep mailing proceedings to our old address where we lived together.
After she moves out, I have the child 3 days per week (156 days a year), and thus file for Leave to Amend Joint Physical Custody after a few months. Once she got the paperwork, I didn't see my son for 2 months. I filed for an Order to Show Cause a second time. Commissioner refuses to issue Order to Show Cause because Orders were never deduced to writing. I objected using Utah Supreme Court precedence stating order need not be reduced to writing for a finding of contempt. The objection is being reviewed by the presiding judge.
I have been granted Leave to Amend my complaint to seek Joint Physical, and I was granted a Motion to Strike her response, which contained no contact info, and she failed to serve me with under Utah Rules of Civil Procedure 4 or 5. I subsequently filed a Motion to Modify Temporary Orders once I got approval to change my Complaint, that Motion is also under advisement.
I have been able to see my son now under minimum visitation since mid-August. We slowly have been talking more. Although she has still not been cooperative.
So I am invited to his birthday party, first time her and I have seen eachother since June. Ofcourse her boyfriend is there, and she mentions before hand that we needed to talk. I ignore her and the boyfriend and just have a good time with my son, it was great we are closer than we ever have been, first birthday party I have been too for him after all this fighting. I figured she'd tell me she was pregnant, or getting married, blah blah blah.
But, no, she is saying she is moving back to Nevada (the child's 11th move), in the middle of proceedings. She wants me to waive the 60-day notice requirements, because her mom suppossively had a mini-stroke, and her dad had another heart attack in prison. Now I am sympathic, I said "ok, well, you can go for 60 days, then come back - move your mom here - whatever but you're not taking our son away again, not moving him into his 11th home." She was like, "if you make it so I can;t see my parent before they die I'll hate you all my life."
I'm getting really anoyed because she is not putting our son before her needs. He needs a stable environment something that lasts more than 6 months at the most. She will go there and have no job, until she can find one - in this economy (took 6 months last time). I understand her mom and dad are not doing ok, but our son's home is here in Utah, where he has me and his little sister. She can move her mom here and take care of her here, she can let me have our son while she is gone, and come back to see him if she really needs to go see see her parents.
I'm thinking of going down and filing an Emergency Temporary Retsraining Order against her tomorrow to prevent the move of the child out of state. Do I have a chance? What is my rate of success here?
My feelings are she is trying to get away from Utah so they will not award me Joint Physical Custody, or eventually Sole Custody, if she continues down her path. It is ot the first time she has done this too me, the last time is was the same BS, "You'll see him once a month for a week," blah blah blah. Of course it never happened that way.
