Step-Mom Needs Help!

[MrsC]

I am the Step-Mom of 2 beautiful girls. My husband is incarcerated at this time. He only has a little over 2 years left and then he will be home. My husbands ex wife has his daughters, there never was any kind of custody agreement of any kind. They live with her. Right now she is going to college full time and trying to work. She decided to let her mom keep the oldest child during the week and her brother and sister-in-law keep the youngest child during the week so she could go to school, work, and study. She told my husband what she was doing with the children while she went to school. He did not like it at all. She gets them on the Saturday IF she don't have to work and sees them when she is not studying. She also stays in another town some during the week at a guy "friend" 's house who also takes the same class as she does so that she can save money on gas and be closer to school. I have been helping her the whole time my husband has been in prison with the children. I pick them up from school/daycare when she cannot, I keep them so she can work, I keep them so she can go out. She allows me to take the children to see their father, but only if she is not mad at me or my husband and they want to go. I usually have the youngest more than the oldest because their grandmother favors the oldest over the youngest. So therefore she keeps the oldest child more than the youngest. I also buy them clothes, Christmas gifts, shoes, and have even given her money to buy food and things the children needed. She also gets help from Social Services such as TANF, Food Stamps, and Medicaid. Her and her mother fight and argue all the time, even in front of the children. Whenever my step-daughters mother gets mad at me because I don't do what she wants me to do when she wants me to do it, she won't allow me or my husband to see the children. Well right now she is mad at me so she won't allow me to see the girls or do anything with them. My husband says there is nothing he can do because he is in prison right now. It is hard to work things out between the 3 of us because she won't visit my husband with me there, and will not discuss things with my husband on the phone when she is mad if I am on the line too. She is very spoiled and always wants to have her way or no way. She uses the children against us all the time. Is there any way that I can get guardianship over my step daughters? I think it would be best for them.

 

[seniorjudge]

Okay, explain something to me.

Pa is in the clink; ma is taking care of the kids.

What do you have to do with any of this?

 

[MrsC]

What do you mean? I explained it to you. I help her out with the kids and taking care of them. I am a parent/caretaker to them. All I wanted to know was if there is anything I can do to get them living with me while she is going to school? Does my husband have any rights since he is in prison?

 

[Duranie]

Your husband has no rights since he is in prison, and you have no rights as a step mom. Sorry but mom is mom and she has the right to allow you to not see the kids. You can try consulting an attorney and see what they say but you are probably out of luck.

 

[lwpat]

You are to be commended for trying to take care of your husband's kids while he is in prison. Unfortunately that is all you can do until he gets out. You have no legal rights so you will just have to suck it up and try to help the kids as much as you can. There is no way for you to get guardianship.

 

[MrsC]

Thank you, that's what I thought.

 

[Scooterdog]

Your husband has no rights since he is in prison, and you have no rights as a step mom. Sorry but mom is mom and she has the right to allow you to not see the kids. You can try consulting an attorney and see what they say but you are probably out of luck.

In Montana, if it's in the child's best interest, 3rd parties can obtain some visitation.