Hello everyone, I'm new and I have a question that may seem out of this world so I will be as specific as possible. I am also desperate and have considered going to the police but would like to get a second opinion about what is happening to me.
A few years ago, before my father passed away, I found out that he had a daughter out of wedlock. He gave her the family last name, a first name but her middle name is the same as my first name. So my father gave her the same middle name as my first name. For privacy reasons I wont post the real names but I will change them to:
Me= "Phoebe Diana Mountain of Gold". Her = "Jane Phoebe Mountain of Gold"
Obviously those are not the real names but similar. Anyways, his daughter out of wedlock was born and lived in another country but towards the time I was in high school, they somehow entered the country illegally and he set them up at a place to live close by. I had no idea. Also later it came to my attention that when she got sick, my father used my insurance card to take her to the doctor's and might have used my social security number to sign her up for school. When I found this out I was devastated. Maybe the fact that he used my IDs to help her out might have opened the door to her now using her middle name as her first name.
She is now using her middle name (my first name) as her first name everywhere. On any social media sites, on messengers, on her yellow page home listing. On everything she seems to be using my name "Phoebe Mountain of Gold". The reason I know is that people who look me up on Facebook, for example, have found her instead of me. My cousins or friends have found her and assume it is me. Which made me curious to find out more.
Also, she has started to use my nickname "Philly" on these sites!! WTF even my nickname which she misspells anyways. And I wonder, is this woman doing this on purpose? Is she doing it to get my attention? Or is she doing it because she might be here illegally and wants to assume my identity since I am a US citizen (I monitor my credit but what if she is using me social security number that my father might have given her access to?) Now, I don't care about social media sites I care about real life. Could this affect me?
My concerns are the following:
-Potential employers use social sites to look up job candidates before calling them. I am concerned that I may loose my chance at a job because an employer would find her. I set up a professional facebook with my name and blocked her so she will not see me.
-If she were to commit a crime...or if she were to be picked up by immigration will any of this affect me? I am a US citizen but if they arrest a "Phoebe Mountain of Gold" could I be the one who gets in trouble? I hear all the time about people getting arrested because of similar names to criminals.
I assume that there is nothing I can do because her middle name is technically hers. I assume that she can indeed use her middle name because it is her legal middle name. I am just angered. It's like if someone is "stealing" my life even though I might have to suck it up since it is her middle name. Consequently she is starting to use her first name as her middle name only. She is essentially establishing herself in this country under my name. While I may be angry and hurt I honestly think there is nothing I can do. Most likely this is not identity theft. I know that there are many people out there who have the same name but in my case this is a person who came here illegally who my father gave the same name to. In real life I do have a very unique name but it doesn't matter, I'm not obsessive over the name. it's just a name but it is a terrible feeling of finding out my father did that and the worry that this woman may do bad things under my name which might affect me and my professional life. Everyone thinks that she is me when they search my name. I'm a professional woman and have a career and have never been in trouble with the law. I have good credit too. But I worry.
Now, this is a long shot. What if anything can I do (even though I think I would not be able to do anything about it because she is using her middle name and many people do that). I thought of going to the police but again I don't think there is anything they would do other than feel sorry for me and think my life is messed up. I check my credit constantly and have not found anything. What if she only uses it for work purposes? Could I find this out? Same first name, same middle name same last name.
Thank you and I apologize if there is something not clear with what I wrote. I hope I was clear enough. Yes I know this sounds like a screwed up family. I do hope I get honest opinions and not any negative comments about how my life is screwed up, which is why I have not sought out any help. Thank you.
(I would also like to note that by the time I found out my father had used my ID cards to help her out in school and with the doctor's many years have passed. She was under 18, he was the one who took my IDs but he has passed away since. This was about 11 yrs ago but I just recently found out that she uses her middle name as her first name. Obviously I would not pursue this a theft because many years have passed, I have no proof and my father passed away a long time ago)
A few years ago, before my father passed away, I found out that he had a daughter out of wedlock. He gave her the family last name, a first name but her middle name is the same as my first name. So my father gave her the same middle name as my first name. For privacy reasons I wont post the real names but I will change them to:
Me= "Phoebe Diana Mountain of Gold". Her = "Jane Phoebe Mountain of Gold"
Obviously those are not the real names but similar. Anyways, his daughter out of wedlock was born and lived in another country but towards the time I was in high school, they somehow entered the country illegally and he set them up at a place to live close by. I had no idea. Also later it came to my attention that when she got sick, my father used my insurance card to take her to the doctor's and might have used my social security number to sign her up for school. When I found this out I was devastated. Maybe the fact that he used my IDs to help her out might have opened the door to her now using her middle name as her first name.
She is now using her middle name (my first name) as her first name everywhere. On any social media sites, on messengers, on her yellow page home listing. On everything she seems to be using my name "Phoebe Mountain of Gold". The reason I know is that people who look me up on Facebook, for example, have found her instead of me. My cousins or friends have found her and assume it is me. Which made me curious to find out more.
Also, she has started to use my nickname "Philly" on these sites!! WTF even my nickname which she misspells anyways. And I wonder, is this woman doing this on purpose? Is she doing it to get my attention? Or is she doing it because she might be here illegally and wants to assume my identity since I am a US citizen (I monitor my credit but what if she is using me social security number that my father might have given her access to?) Now, I don't care about social media sites I care about real life. Could this affect me?
My concerns are the following:
-Potential employers use social sites to look up job candidates before calling them. I am concerned that I may loose my chance at a job because an employer would find her. I set up a professional facebook with my name and blocked her so she will not see me.
-If she were to commit a crime...or if she were to be picked up by immigration will any of this affect me? I am a US citizen but if they arrest a "Phoebe Mountain of Gold" could I be the one who gets in trouble? I hear all the time about people getting arrested because of similar names to criminals.
I assume that there is nothing I can do because her middle name is technically hers. I assume that she can indeed use her middle name because it is her legal middle name. I am just angered. It's like if someone is "stealing" my life even though I might have to suck it up since it is her middle name. Consequently she is starting to use her first name as her middle name only. She is essentially establishing herself in this country under my name. While I may be angry and hurt I honestly think there is nothing I can do. Most likely this is not identity theft. I know that there are many people out there who have the same name but in my case this is a person who came here illegally who my father gave the same name to. In real life I do have a very unique name but it doesn't matter, I'm not obsessive over the name. it's just a name but it is a terrible feeling of finding out my father did that and the worry that this woman may do bad things under my name which might affect me and my professional life. Everyone thinks that she is me when they search my name. I'm a professional woman and have a career and have never been in trouble with the law. I have good credit too. But I worry.
Now, this is a long shot. What if anything can I do (even though I think I would not be able to do anything about it because she is using her middle name and many people do that). I thought of going to the police but again I don't think there is anything they would do other than feel sorry for me and think my life is messed up. I check my credit constantly and have not found anything. What if she only uses it for work purposes? Could I find this out? Same first name, same middle name same last name.
Thank you and I apologize if there is something not clear with what I wrote. I hope I was clear enough. Yes I know this sounds like a screwed up family. I do hope I get honest opinions and not any negative comments about how my life is screwed up, which is why I have not sought out any help. Thank you.
(I would also like to note that by the time I found out my father had used my ID cards to help her out in school and with the doctor's many years have passed. She was under 18, he was the one who took my IDs but he has passed away since. This was about 11 yrs ago but I just recently found out that she uses her middle name as her first name. Obviously I would not pursue this a theft because many years have passed, I have no proof and my father passed away a long time ago)
Last edited:
