Custody for unmarried parents in Iowa

[justblue]

He is not involved right now but has said he wants 50 50 custody. He says things but hasn't acted yet.

If/When he actually gets off his duff and files then you can "worry". A judge will likely give him shared legal (decision making) and visitation which will likely be supervised until the child gets to know him.

Keep in mind that your child having a relationship with his Dad is a good thing...you want to facilitate this relationship.

 

[Zigner]

He is not involved right now but has said he wants 50 50 custody. He says things but hasn't acted yet.

"50 50 custody" is not likely in the short term, but it is possible in the long term. He will need to be proactive about it.

 

[leslie82]

Agreed...but people can


Thanks. He is on the birth certificate because paternity was established when child support was ordered. He was not on the original birth certificate. He never responded when served for child support so they automatically established him as the father. He never signed a paternity affidavit. It was also my understanding from what I had read that he would have to file for custody, but definitely could if he wanted to since he is the established father. But until then I assumed I had sole custody.

Yes he 100% can file for custody or visitation since he has established paternity. He has parental rights to file for that. But if he's been absent - why do you think he will? Granted people like that can file after not being around for years. Generally with dads, it's when a new gf enters the picture and pushes him to do so.

Your best bet is to find family law attorneys in your area who offer a free consultation to get the most accurate and legit legal advice. At this point, from what you wrote, he can't just take the child. If you're worried about him coming and taking the kid, go file for custody first. If he didn't show up to the paternity hearing he probably won't show up to a custody hearing.

 

[leslie82]

He is not involved right now but has said he wants 50 50 custody. He says things but hasn't acted yet.

It's just empty "threats." Again if you're worried about it you go file for custody first. He can say all he wants but if he's not filing anything, it's just words. I'd just ignore him until I got something in the mail about filing for custody.

 

[adjusterjack]

Agree. There is no threaten to file, there is only file or not file. Until court papers are served it's all hot air that should be ignored and buttons not allowed to be pushed.

Unless, of course, one wants to be magnanimous and voluntarily offer visitation.