Do you need to give your City all the arguments you have against them before suing them?

[Red Kayak]

As long as she lives in that house the chance of her detransitioning is nill because everyone that lives there is trans.

Also if I can do something legal against B it would serve to show the trans community that they cannot incite misappropriation of funds to incite someone to live at their house and go unscathed.

Would I have a case if we sued B?

Yeah, well, it's HIS business as a legal adult what HE does. You don't have standing to sue B or anyone else in this matter. If your parents had some sort of agreement (contract) with your sibling concerning tuition payments, they *might* have grounds to sue for the return of some of that money back if the contract was breached. *Might.* (Unlikely.)

Here is the whole story and what the ordinance department said and why I disagree with them:

Legal Case based on Code of Ordinances and Casetext

Intro On Aug 2023, my 20 yr old sister (junior in university) moved out to a house managed by her ftm (female to male transgender) friend I will refer to as “B.” Our parents have told my sister that they will be paying for her university tuition under the condition that she lives at home while ...

docs.google.com

Yeah, you have no case.

You made a complaint with code enforcement, the complaint was investigated, and it was determined that your complaint did not rise to the level of code violation.

Actually, you have less that no case.

You are causing pain to your sibling and those that care about your sibling's emotional health - because it's pretty clear that your ONLY motive is to maintain your sibling's identity as female/sister/she/her, regardless of whether that's in his best interest. You sibling should file for a restraining order against you. Your frivolous code enforcement complaint and your postings here could be used as evidence in order to obtain that order.

Observations:
1) You catch more flies with honey: your behavior is pushing your sibling away.
2) You cannot make someone change who they really are.

I've never met your sibling, so I don't know if they're confused, experimenting, or truly trans. I do know that if you're half as insensitive in person as you come across here, that your sibling doesn't feel seen or loved by you.

 

[Tax Counsel]

The crime would be misappropriation of funds.

[/QUOTE]

The crime, as you describe it, is fraud, inducing dad to pay tuition by representing she'll live in the agreed living situation, which she knew at the time she did not intend to do. But that has nothing whatsoever to do with the zoning and use decisions. That's a personal dispute between Dad and daughter. If dad wants to sue her in court to reclaim the money he gave her, he certainly may pursue that. That's the remedy for this problem, not attacking the zoning/use decision.

Since she did not want to delay her graduation and really wanted to attend the Fall 2023 semester, if she wanted tuition for that semester then the fair thing to do would be to abide by the condition under which the tuition was given.

Fair and legal are, however, two different things. Again, if she broke the contract, Dad may sue her for that. That is the remedy for it. Dad may not like that she plans to transition from female to male, but since she's an adult, he has no say in that decision and going to court over that would lead him nowhere.

If B and other friends were saying she should just drop out of the semester for now and leave home, then I wouldn't have problem with that legally. But the friends were encouraging her to leave after the tuition was paid, against the will of the parents who paid that tuition.

Nothing illegal in her friends doing that. It was still ultimately her decision what to do. She may have been persuaded by friends to break the deal with Dad, but that's not a crime. Had they induced her to commit a crime, that would be another matter. Breaking a contract, however, is no a crime. Encouraging her to break the contract might give Dad a civil claim against them for interference with contractual relations. But once again, that has nothing to do with the zoning issue nor it is a criminal matter.

There is nothing in the argument you posted that indicates that you have any standing to contest the zoning decision or that the decision would cause you to suffer some kind of financial harm. You want the decision made to deny the rental status as a way to force her out of a living situation you deem inappropriate. That, however, isn't a basis the law recognizes to give you standing to interfere with the zoning and use decisions. You may not like it (perhaps you view what she's doing as a sin under your religious beliefs) but it's her life and she has the right to live it as she wishes. You and the rest of the family do not have the right to control her. Furthermore, your efforts to do so may actually harm her well being as science has shown that sexual orientation/gender issues are genetic, not simply life choices. By trying to make her suppress who she really is you can cause her emotional harm. You can also push her away from the family such that she'll never want to have anything to do with you. Love means accepting people as they are, not trying to force them to be something you want them to be.

Your motives may be in the right place as you regard your actions as helping her, but it isn't your role to control her life, however much you might want to. You'll need to either decide to be accepting of her for who she is, even if you think she may be on the wrong path, decide to at least just ignore that issue and maintain a good relationship based on things you have in common, or if you truly cannot stand her if she makes that transition, you may need to just cut off the relationship rather than continuing to hurt her by trying to put roadblocks in her way to living the kind of life she wants to have.

 

[legalaiu]

"If dad wants to sue her in court to reclaim the money he gave her, he certainly may pursue that."

Would he be able to just sue her friends without suing her in the process too?

 

[Red Kayak]

"If dad wants to sue her in court to reclaim the money he gave her, he certainly may pursue that."

Would he be able to just sue her friends without suing her in the process too?

Dad can choose to sue whoever he feels like suing. Whether he can successfully sue somebody is another story. Different people have different definitions for success.

On what basis would Dad sue his adult child's friend(s)?

Dad didn't give the friends money, or have some agreement (contract) with them; Dad cannot sue the friends for the return of the money he paid for tuition.

I suppose that Dad could try to claim that he has a case for emotional damage, since he's not happy with how things have panned out, but frankly your sibling has a stronger basis for a countersuit. If Dad is stupid enough to pursue this legal route, your sibling would be completely reasonable in going no contact with Dad and any family member that sides with Dad.

So, just to clarify: your goal is to make your sibling's friends so miserable that they'll kick your sibling out? And that your sibling will then move back home to avoid being homeless, and start dressing/acting like a traditional heterosexual female again (whatever that means)?

 

[welkin]

I think that we have heard enough to know that this is not about a zoning issue. It is about a sibling trying to somehow course his sister to abandon her rights to live her life as she pleases., a lifestyle that brother does not approve of.

Time to lock the thread.

 

[adjusterjack]

Agree.

Thread locked.