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Question regarding access of Facebook and email
- Thread Starter mesapsa
- Start date
Did you evict him when you guys broke up? What does your state say about someone living with you?
Where I live here's what the cops told me when I called them after my ex husband (we were kind of back together at the time) took my car and then called me demanding $100 for meth or he'd slam my car into a wall. This was last year in April. We got divorced in Aug the year prior. He went to rehab and seemed to clean up but he didn't move in right away he was in a halfway house. Then he left the halfway house and came with me. Got arrested for something before he went to rehab and I stupidly bailed him out. He lived with me for a month and a half before he took off with my car. They asked if I wanted him arrested. I said yes. I said I didn't want him to stay in my apartment. The cops said that I would have to get him evicted and this state doesn't have a time limit for how long someone has to live with you to be a tenant. I said he's not on the lease anymore. They said doesn't matter. They could have been wrong. I didn't have to worry. He went to jail. Mommy came and got him a month later.
My ex had no job when he was with me and just sat around the house. He did stay home with our daughter til I kicked him out. But he didn't do much with her. I spend just as much on daycare a month as he mooched out of me and she actually learns at daycare and has friends. He did clean and cook sometimes I guess...
Look people make mistakes and fall for the wrong person sometimes. I did it. You have to learn and move on. You should not have let him back in. But unless you can prove that stuff is yours I'm not sure how much you might get back. Unless you have proof of him saying he stole your stuff...
I would have told the investigator "Hey he left his Facebook and email logged in. I read some of his messages. Can you use anything in this or not that might be incriminating?" You didn't do anything wrong. He left his crap unsecured.
But he could easily say that he was still a tenant there (depending on the laws of the state) and that you guys bought that stuff mutually.
If you got reimbursed who cares if he gets arrested? Investigations take time. It's frustrating. I know I've seen it personally and I have had to explain it when I was a victim advocate. I've seen it when my ex has had a trial pushed four times in the last almost year since he got arrested. The lawyers have to file certain things and so on.
Where I live here's what the cops told me when I called them after my ex husband (we were kind of back together at the time) took my car and then called me demanding $100 for meth or he'd slam my car into a wall. This was last year in April. We got divorced in Aug the year prior. He went to rehab and seemed to clean up but he didn't move in right away he was in a halfway house. Then he left the halfway house and came with me. Got arrested for something before he went to rehab and I stupidly bailed him out. He lived with me for a month and a half before he took off with my car. They asked if I wanted him arrested. I said yes. I said I didn't want him to stay in my apartment. The cops said that I would have to get him evicted and this state doesn't have a time limit for how long someone has to live with you to be a tenant. I said he's not on the lease anymore. They said doesn't matter. They could have been wrong. I didn't have to worry. He went to jail. Mommy came and got him a month later.
My ex had no job when he was with me and just sat around the house. He did stay home with our daughter til I kicked him out. But he didn't do much with her. I spend just as much on daycare a month as he mooched out of me and she actually learns at daycare and has friends. He did clean and cook sometimes I guess...
Look people make mistakes and fall for the wrong person sometimes. I did it. You have to learn and move on. You should not have let him back in. But unless you can prove that stuff is yours I'm not sure how much you might get back. Unless you have proof of him saying he stole your stuff...
I would have told the investigator "Hey he left his Facebook and email logged in. I read some of his messages. Can you use anything in this or not that might be incriminating?" You didn't do anything wrong. He left his crap unsecured.
But he could easily say that he was still a tenant there (depending on the laws of the state) and that you guys bought that stuff mutually.
If you got reimbursed who cares if he gets arrested? Investigations take time. It's frustrating. I know I've seen it personally and I have had to explain it when I was a victim advocate. I've seen it when my ex has had a trial pushed four times in the last almost year since he got arrested. The lawyers have to file certain things and so on.
I never had him on the lease, he lived here for 4 months, moved out for 3+ weeks, came back to try and work things out and on day #2 came home, he was gone and also most of my stuff. Police took a report of theft, since over $6000 worth of items were taken. Insurance company has already paid for missing items but I want this guy arrested and put in jail so this NEVER happens to someone else again by this guy! This happened 2 days before Christmas. ruined my holiday, ruined my life basically. He needs jail time. I have receipts for some items, some I don't, we'll see what happens. He needs do to some jail time.
army judge
Super Moderator
He might not get tried.
As he was an known associate of yours, this matter may not go to trial.
Cases such as this tend to deferred programs, if the person has a limited criminal history.
Don't expect jail time for him, as he's likely to get probation, if he gets convicted at all.
Remember, the state must prove its case.
A video, absent other direct evidence, eyewitnesses doesn't move most juries to convict.
That's why prosecutors offer deals.
In this event we have no eyewitnesses, as he lived in the home, his DNA and fingerprints are scattered all over the premises.
A video of a guy that you allowed to live in your home carrying junk away, isn't all that probative, in a legal sense.
His defense could argue the junk he was seen carrying was his, or you gave him the junk he allegedly carried away, or he was taking the junk to you pursuant to your instruction.
Hold your horses, lower your expectations, so that you don't get disappointed.
The good news, you're smarter and won't allow any, shiftless, grifters, scammers, con-artists, trifling, unemployed, deadbeats to ever enter your home again.
If you're as smart as I think you've become, you won't even talk to deadbeats, ever.
Even better news, he didn't breed you like a stallion, and leave his mess all up in your kitchen, so you could bake a little deadbeat in nine months and never receive 10¢ worth of child support.
He also didn't get to batter you, as most of those booze imbibing, or illegal drug ingesting deadbeats also do to the women they CONQUER.
This happened in a large city in Texas. The dollar amount were talking about should be a felony which you would think will be investigated. Also there is footage of this guy carrying stuff down the stairs and putting things into a vehicle and racing off. Even a Facebook post sent to me from him stating that he didn't take my stuff, well he was seen in the footage carrying things down the stairs... what else do the police need here? Ridiculous that he is not in custody right now as I am afraid he will try to leave the state.
What about the Facebook post to me that "he didn't take my stuff"? Could this not be used in court against him when he is shown clearly to be taking things to a vehicle? What about if I am able to prove that he did this by information that he posts online on Facebook Messenger talking to other people about this since HE left himself logged on? If and when he posts information regarding this crime I will go to the police detective to advise him that when he left my home he left my laptop on the sofa and signed into everything! What an idiot this guy is!
army judge
Super Moderator
He might not be a dumb deadbeat.
Frankly, if I were his defense lawyer, I could argue that know one knows who posted the musings on FakeBook.
The victim says she found him logged on to a couple social media sites.
Maybe the victim posted the inculpating comments to salt the mine hoping to show my client in a poor light to strengthen the state's weak evidence and speculative case.
My point is, the defense need not prove one thing.
The state has the burden of proving the things they allege.
The defense need only sow the seeds of "reasonable doubt".
The less anyone says about a contentious topic, no matter what side you're on, the better.
Like I said it depends on the state. My state it doesn't matter if they were on the lease or not if they lived in a place they would have to be evicted and there's no minimum time limit they have to live there to file eviction. I'm just saying you might want to Google the laws in Texas about if a significant other lives with you and how that applies.
He might not get charges filed after they do their investigation. They'll probably talk to him and he MIGHT say that you guys bought that together when he lived there for four months. I don't know.
Just because you want him arrested doesn't mean he will. I've seen my ex slip out of a lot of stuff he should have been in jail for.
Some people who deserve jail don't see it. That's life. You might want to just not worry about that and focus on your life. YOU can't control if they file charges against him or if he goes to jail or not. You called the police. Filed a report. Let them handle it. That's their job. You're just going to make yourself crazy worrying about this.
Did you miss that army judge said HIS lawyer could argue that it was his stuff. That video doesn't prove that it's your stuff.
The police need evidence -and the prosecutor has to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that this crime happened. The defense is going to try to put doubt in the jurors' heads if it gets that far.
IF any charges get filed it will likely get plead down to a lesser charge and probation. Or nothing at all. If he leaves the state GOOD! Then you don't have to see him again!! If he ends up scamming someone else he does. It sucks but you can't save others. People like him or going to scam people probably for their entire lives. You can't sit there and obsess over it and try to figure out where he is or who he associates with to "warn" them.
I mean you can. It's your life if you want to waste it on him that's fine. That's all you're doing.
Your 100% correct that I should focus on me and not him. It's just in my mind unbelievable that before I left for work that I told him that I loved him and he told me the same, he walked me to the door and locked it behind him like he always had done and then went through my home packaging things that he wanted to take from me. Just something that I could never do to someone in a million years, no matter how much I hated them.
And to then have the nerve to send me a Facebook message stating he didn't take my things even though he did, it was all shown on video.
Not to mention his sister called me an hour later, she was the driver of the vehicle and ask me that if he returned the items if I would drop the charges! And all along she was involved in this but of course I didn't know that until I saw the video tape.
When the police officer was at my house he even tried to call and talk to me, I handed the phone to the officer, he explained who he was and he hung up on the officer.
Complete loser and complete disregard for me and my property after everything that I did for him. Lesson learned but he needs to pay for this crime. If the police don't charge him I'll file a lawsuit against him in court for this. I don't care how much time or money it will cost as I want to drag him into court over what he has done.
And to the attorney who stated that if he was your client that you would rebut the computer messages it would be sort of hard for me from my end to send messages to him, I'm sure that can be verified as well as to the origin of computer messages. I'm just monitoring his chats and the first time he admits to this in detail I'm taking to the police.
You're not the only one to get bamboozled. I let my ex husband mooch half my savings - and I had at one time $30,000+ in my savings. I even freaking married him after he hit me twice. He wrote checks on my account. He stole from me. Lied to me. Manipulated me. You're not the only one to fall for someone like that. It happens.
My ex has complete disregard for everyone else. In fact he really doesn't care about himself because he does so much meth I'm not sure how he's alive still. He did at least get probation for the last time he hit me. He went to jail for taking my car. He got 30 days on what should have been a year in jail because the prosecutor gave him a deal. Plead guilty and he'd get time served which was 30 days at that point. So he took it. He's on trial for a robbery that has been continued for the last almost year. I stupidly bailed him out because I didn't think he did it and he had been sober and stable. He fucked me over - relapsed the night I bailed him out. Should've just taken him right back that night.
No it wouldn't be hard for you to send messages from his account or to his account if he left it open. It would be quite easy for you to send messages from his account especially if he left it logged in. Or you got in some other time. It would be very easy for a defense lawyer to argue it and get those messages tossed out.
Life is crazy and the even more crazy thing here was that I almost married this man a month ago! Thank god I didn't! Maybe this happened for good reason even after he beat me two times, had me in a headlock and even placed a knife to my neck. Yes I was stupid for taking him back. He was hooked on marijuana and smoked it everyday without missing a day. He was a complete loser and I guess was too for putting up with this guy.
He'll get what he deserves in due time. Not by me, probably by someone else that he tries to rob or beat.
Probably not. I'm very surprised my ex hasn't been shot, beaten or killed with the people he has screwed over in drug deals. Or the fact that purely the amount of alcohol I've seen him drink would kill a normal person - and right around Christmas he shot up so much meth he got an infection in his arm. Apparently he was trying to put himself in a coma...he either has a high tolerance to drugs or something. I don't know. He's very lucky my brothers and father didn't take care of him but I told them not to as their lives and freedom are not worth beating him.
He might get bitch slapped by karma, might not. But he will likely be alone and miserable for the rest of his life so that should be something. Pretty sure that is what my ex will end up being. He already is alone and miserable.
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