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Mental Health Thread #8 - Fall is here!!
- Thread Starter Betty3
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Betty3
Well-Known Member
I hear you, Elle. I trained many new life ins. underwriters. I was always nice too because I remember being new myself once but sometimes I did want to scream at some of them.
cbg
Super Moderator
I can't imagine you screaming at anyone, Betty. 
Betty3
Well-Known Member
Just inside - if I screamed at someone, I would feel bad & probably remember it forever. Some people do get on my nerves on occasion though but I try to think maybe they are going through some type of "problem" & maybe the person at work was doing the best they could.
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I'm not a screamer at all and I would feel really bad if I ever did scream at someone. If tempted to yell, I will wait until I'm calm and talk to the person in a very quiet tone. On a number of occasions though I have counseled someone in a serious manner and later overheard them say they got yelled at.
Betty3
Well-Known Member
That is a lot of times what employees tell their friends/co-workers.
I'm not a screamer, either. I am a very strong person and it isn't easy to push me around, but I pride myself on being very "user-friendly" at work, and that includes not raising my voice.
I remember one time when I had been on vacation and while I was gone, something was changed on my computer without my knowledge and I couldn't get into some reports I needed. I went to the person who had made the changes and told them I couldn't get my reports. I didn't raise my voice at all, in fact I wasn't mad, I was just a little freaked out because I couldn't get the things I needed to do my job and was afraid they'd been lost completely. No sooner had I gotten back to my own office than my boss came in and said "so-and-so just called and said that you came to their office and yelled at them about some reports you couldn't get into". I have always gone out of my way to NOT be that person, so I was pretty upset that somebody would say that. Then I thought about it and figured out that the accusation of me "yelling" came from the fact that they made changes to my computer and failed to fix it, so by telling the boss that I yelled at them they were trying to deflect attention away from the fact that they messed up.
I remember one time when I had been on vacation and while I was gone, something was changed on my computer without my knowledge and I couldn't get into some reports I needed. I went to the person who had made the changes and told them I couldn't get my reports. I didn't raise my voice at all, in fact I wasn't mad, I was just a little freaked out because I couldn't get the things I needed to do my job and was afraid they'd been lost completely. No sooner had I gotten back to my own office than my boss came in and said "so-and-so just called and said that you came to their office and yelled at them about some reports you couldn't get into". I have always gone out of my way to NOT be that person, so I was pretty upset that somebody would say that. Then I thought about it and figured out that the accusation of me "yelling" came from the fact that they made changes to my computer and failed to fix it, so by telling the boss that I yelled at them they were trying to deflect attention away from the fact that they messed up.
Betty3
Well-Known Member
Yep, sometimes they tell other people that to make you look bad also. I think it's always best to keep calm & your voice down (if at all possible) no matter what. It seems some people can't though - I have heard people yell at work including bosses. (not at me though )
)ferretrick
Member
I used to work for a boss with a serious Jekyll/Hyde personality and on Hyde days he was absolutely out of control-red faced, screaming, slamming doors, and using every four letter word you can think of. If someone accuses my of yelling now, I tell them I can show them what yelling really looks like if they want to see it.
I'm the same txls. I won't let my munchkins curse either. My rule with them is that when they turn 18 and have earned a diploma, they may choose for themselves what kind of language they want to use. Until then, they need to find other ways to express themselves. I don't want them to get in the habit of swearing as a default. It is always amusing when they come back from college and confess that they now can't just swear without thinking about what they are trying to express first. Mission accomplished
On the flip side, I just had a very sweet new employee in her very first job ever come in to see me. She is just so happy to have a job and says she now feels like a real grown up. She did wonder if something was wrong with her first check as there was $100+ taken out for FICA. I welcomed her to adulthood and the wonderful world of taxes.
On the flip side, I just had a very sweet new employee in her very first job ever come in to see me. She is just so happy to have a job and says she now feels like a real grown up. She did wonder if something was wrong with her first check as there was $100+ taken out for FICA. I welcomed her to adulthood and the wonderful world of taxes.
Betty3
Well-Known Member
Quote Elle: "It takes a lot to make me really lose it. Long about 3 PM yesterday, I would have traded my own mother for a shovel and an alibi."
That had to be a bad afternoon.
That had to be a bad afternoon.
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CdwJava
Moderator
My thoughts on an event this weekend that has tempered my normally ebullient mood:
In recent weeks and months, it seems to have become 'en vogue' to assail law enforcement as militaristic, heavy-handed, thuggish, and even downright evil. We have seen rallies against questionable actions by law enforcement officials as well as protests against what appear to be objectively legitimate law enforcement actions. But, no matter the spin and the outcry from those who seek some political or personal gain from stirring the pot of discord, there are still those who pin on the badge and go forth to protect and to serve each day ... too often, to serve the people for the last time.
Such was the case Friday October 24th when Luis Enrique Monroy-Bracamonte (aka Marcelo Marquez) - a twice-deported felon - gunned down two Sacramento County Sheriff's Deputies checking on a suspicious vehicle killing Deputy Danny Oliver. The subsequent manhunt ultimately resulted in the suspect critically wounding a citizen who refused to give up his vehicle to the suspect and his girlfriend, and ultimately slaying Placer County Sheriff's Detective Michael Davis.
Evil has returned to the north state as it has in too many places this year alone. We grieve with our brothers and sisters in Sacramento and Placer County as we have lost our own brothers behind the badge. But, we must always remember that no matter the political winds or the slogans, chants and vitriol of those who protest against law & order, and decency, there will always be those who choose to quietly and dutifully pin on their badge and go forth to serve and protect; they fulfill their oath ethically and with the quiet dignity that the public expects of them.
So, even as we all grieve, we will continue to take to the streets and perform our duty. Not for ourselves, not for the politicians who join the protests at election time, and not for any pats on the back or kudos, but for those who have gone before and given their all in service to the communities that each of us has given our oath to serve, to defend, and to protect to the best of our abilities - so help us, God.
May God bless the families of the fallen, and may He grant serenity to our brothers and sisters in the law enforcement community.
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I never dreamed it would be me
My name for all eternity
Recorded here at this hallowed place
Alas, my name, no more my face
"In the line of duty" I hear them say
My family now the price will pay
My folded flag stained with their tears
We only had those few short years
The badge no longer on my chest
I sleep now in eternal rest
My sword I pass to those behind
And pray they keep this thought in mind
I never dreamed it would be me
And with heavy heart and bended knee
I ask for all here from the past
Dear God, let my name be the last
-- The Monument, by Sgt. George Hahn, LAPD (retired)
In recent weeks and months, it seems to have become 'en vogue' to assail law enforcement as militaristic, heavy-handed, thuggish, and even downright evil. We have seen rallies against questionable actions by law enforcement officials as well as protests against what appear to be objectively legitimate law enforcement actions. But, no matter the spin and the outcry from those who seek some political or personal gain from stirring the pot of discord, there are still those who pin on the badge and go forth to protect and to serve each day ... too often, to serve the people for the last time.
Such was the case Friday October 24th when Luis Enrique Monroy-Bracamonte (aka Marcelo Marquez) - a twice-deported felon - gunned down two Sacramento County Sheriff's Deputies checking on a suspicious vehicle killing Deputy Danny Oliver. The subsequent manhunt ultimately resulted in the suspect critically wounding a citizen who refused to give up his vehicle to the suspect and his girlfriend, and ultimately slaying Placer County Sheriff's Detective Michael Davis.
Evil has returned to the north state as it has in too many places this year alone. We grieve with our brothers and sisters in Sacramento and Placer County as we have lost our own brothers behind the badge. But, we must always remember that no matter the political winds or the slogans, chants and vitriol of those who protest against law & order, and decency, there will always be those who choose to quietly and dutifully pin on their badge and go forth to serve and protect; they fulfill their oath ethically and with the quiet dignity that the public expects of them.
So, even as we all grieve, we will continue to take to the streets and perform our duty. Not for ourselves, not for the politicians who join the protests at election time, and not for any pats on the back or kudos, but for those who have gone before and given their all in service to the communities that each of us has given our oath to serve, to defend, and to protect to the best of our abilities - so help us, God.
May God bless the families of the fallen, and may He grant serenity to our brothers and sisters in the law enforcement community.
----------
I never dreamed it would be me
My name for all eternity
Recorded here at this hallowed place
Alas, my name, no more my face
"In the line of duty" I hear them say
My family now the price will pay
My folded flag stained with their tears
We only had those few short years
The badge no longer on my chest
I sleep now in eternal rest
My sword I pass to those behind
And pray they keep this thought in mind
I never dreamed it would be me
And with heavy heart and bended knee
I ask for all here from the past
Dear God, let my name be the last
-- The Monument, by Sgt. George Hahn, LAPD (retired)
As the aunt of one police officer and the grandmother of a girl who fervently hopes to become one, thank you for that. Too often we find it easy to look at the mistakes & errors in judgment made by a few individuals and use that to vilify and criticize the whole field without remembering those truly good, decent, and dedicated officers who go out and put themselves in harm's way every day to serve and protect, and those who are lost during the performance of that duty.
Betty3
Well-Known Member
They may turn really, really slow but they are turning it seems & in the right direction.
Betty3
Well-Known Member
CdwJava - I appreciate & thank the law enforcement community for all that you put up with & do to help & protect us. May God Bless you all & protect you all from harm. I know many times you are taken for granted & by some even "hated". We had the Ferguson incident here in my area of the country.
CdwJava
Moderator
And Ferguson may not be the example of jackbooted policing that many seem to think (or want) it to be. It's also where there were protests because an officer had the audacity to return fire after he was shot at and the suspect was killed ... THAT makes no sense to me at all.
Certainly there are heinous examples of bad policing out there. But, all too often many are too quick to judge and make their decisions based upon bullet points, headlines, partial or faulty "facts" and are eager to see malfeasance where it doesn't actually exist.
Certainly there are heinous examples of bad policing out there. But, all too often many are too quick to judge and make their decisions based upon bullet points, headlines, partial or faulty "facts" and are eager to see malfeasance where it doesn't actually exist.
So the Judge in our state says we have the right to go get your grandkids from another state where their mother took them. And gives us the paperwork. Nope, says another state. You have to get an attorney in our state and have a hearing in our state and it will be at least another 20 days.
What good did it do us to have court orders that said she could not remove them from our state. Useless paper. Grrr!
What good did it do us to have court orders that said she could not remove them from our state. Useless paper. Grrr!
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