Not Guilty by means of Incompetence

[leslie82]

I have a lawyer but I just like to hear things from multiple people, again just how my brain works.

If I have primary custody (she visits her mom every other weekend, at her grandparents house and they have to supervise the visit), I opened modification case after the DUI's, because her mom continues to struggle with her drinking problem.

There would have to be something that happened that would allow her to end up with primary custody correct? The courts shouldn't completely flip custody of my daughter. Being a single dad in the court system scares me, my daughter is happy, healthy, excelling in PreK (student of the month twice) and in many activities. Something would have to happen to change her from her norm to with her mom primarily right? I don't know why I worry about it common sense says she should be with me even more than she is now for safety reasons, but common sense and courts don't always go together.

Again just a concerned dad looking for support.

Why do you think they would give her sole custody after all this time? You said you have physical and joint legal right? So that should mean she's with you most of the time anyway.

If you want to drive yourself nuts go for it. But you aren't going to find out the answer any faster no here. Court processes take time. Everyone has given you legit information.

IF she does get diagnosed with a mental illness that likely won't be used against her in family court. They let drug addicts be around kids why wouldn't they let someone with an actual illness or disease that they can usually control be around their kids? There is a low threshold for parenting in this country and your ex will get chance after chance to be a mom.

You have a lawyer. Listen to him. That's what you pay him for. Advice and to manage your legal situation with custody. If you don't trust him, hire someone else.

 

[TaylorsDad]

Why do you think they would give her sole custody after all this time? You said you have physical and joint legal right? So that should mean she's with you most of the time anyway.

If you want to drive yourself nuts go for it. But you aren't going to find out the answer any faster no here. Court processes take time. Everyone has given you legit information.

IF she does get diagnosed with a mental illness that likely won't be used against her in family court. They let drug addicts be around kids why wouldn't they let someone with an actual illness or disease that they can usually control be around their kids? There is a low threshold for parenting in this country and your ex will get chance after chance to be a mom.

You have a lawyer. Listen to him. That's what you pay him for. Advice and to manage your legal situation with custody. If you don't trust him, hire someone else.

I have primary custody and tie breaking legal, I know I am just driving myself mad but it's my daughters life and well being we are talking about.

 

[leslie82]

I have primary custody and tie breaking legal, I know I am just driving myself mad but it's my daughters life and well being we are talking about.

Yeah got it. Everyone gets that. But you can't do anything to speed things up. You just can't. So either you can obsess over it or you just wait it out. It's your life. If you want to add stress to your life that could be avoided that's on you. Nothing is going to happen to your daughter at this point and time. So why stress about it?

 

[TaylorsDad]

Yeah got it. Everyone gets that. But you can't do anything to speed things up. You just can't. So either you can obsess over it or you just wait it out. It's your life. If you want to add stress to your life that could be avoided that's on you. Nothing is going to happen to your daughter at this point and time. So why stress about it?

I don't know I can't turn my brain off. It sucks

 

[army judge]

I don't know I can't turn my brain off. It sucks

Use your extra energy to do something good.
Spend more time playing with your daughter, use the time to read to her, take her to the park, take her for a ride in your car, take her for pizza (or her favorite treat or snack), bake cookies with her, teach her how to make a salad, show her things she doesn't know (birds, flowers, animals), etc...

Use your negative energy to make you and your child happy.

My kids, and my grandkids love it when we do things together, and I bet your child does, too.